


Almond Flour

by hideki16seiyuu



Series: Two Hands to Hold [1]
Category: The Adventure Zone (Podcast)
Genre: Baking, Cooking Lessons, F/M, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Magnus missing Julia, Mentions of Sazed and Kravitz who are not in this fic, Merle Ships It, Post-Wonderland, Travis-type joke near the end, meta jokes, pondering mortality, taako isn't good at talking about feelings
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-10
Updated: 2017-02-10
Packaged: 2018-09-23 05:41:10
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,204
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9643010
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hideki16seiyuu/pseuds/hideki16seiyuu
Summary: After escaping Wonderland, Magnus dares to consider how much time he has left.





	

**Author's Note:**

> I haven't written any fic in quite some time, so this is exciting! Yes, I do ship Taakitz but this is a Taagnus fic. (Taako has two hands for two boys. Don't even trip.)
> 
> Also, I know they said "macaroons" in the show, but I think Justin meant "macarons".
> 
> EDIT: Written after episode 55, so canon after that point didn't exist yet and I'm sorry for the missed opportunities 56 had to offer.

It seemed right that people across the world loved Taako.

The way the elf stood and moved was so calculated and beautiful. While this was common in the other elves that Magnus had met in his travels, Taako tended to err on the side our flourish over function. Even when the action in the room was away from the wizard, Taako had his own way of sneaking a bit of the attention back to him - just another thing to steal, it seemed - but never in a way that came across as needy or over-the-top.

He would examine his nails, or sweep a lock of golden hair out of his beautifully eyes, or readjust his stance to cock a hip one way that caught Magnus’ ever-alert surveillance.

Okay, maybe it was just Magnus that was paying attention.

Regardless, the entire thing was just so  _ Taako _ that it made the pulse hiccup when he caught it.

It wasn’t just the movement either. It was also the way he spoke.

The bizarre arrangement of pitches that made up Taako’s vocalizations caught people’s attention right away. The first time he had heard him speak back in the Phandalin tavern, Magnus couldn’t help but crack a grin into his tankard. If it weren’t for his rustic hospitality, he probably would have laughed. As time went on, however, he found the voice quite soothing. Taako was one to wait his turn to speak unless he was getting emotional (which wasn’t often) or had a really good one-liner (which was far more frequent). When he did speak over others, his unique voice cut through the noise and clearly made itself heard in a way that, once again, commanded attention.

In those quiet, sincere moments that were so rare when dealing with the wizard, the voice softened so the listener would have to focus in on it, hear the subtle cracks in Taako’s voice and practically see the lilt slip beyond his lips.

The cracking is what always got him.

Merle wasn’t old by dwarven standards, but he was far past his younger years by now. His silver hair made that clear.

Magnus, too, was no spring chicken, especially with the life he was leading. Thirty-two was getting up there for an adventurer, and ten more years sacrificed in Wonderland put him at an age he never expected to live to naturally.

Taako was still a very young man by elven standards.

It made Magnus’ enhanced age all the more glaringly obvious; while his two companions would have already outlived him as they were inclined to by their biology, he started to wonder if “Magnus at forty-two” meant “Magnus will drop dead in the next few years before my non-human friends can blink”.

He hadn’t considered that part.

 

That was so like him, though - to rush in first, have to live with the consequences later. It was just that this time, instead of a new scar or a heavy blow in battle, the consequence was the lingering reality that his time with his travelling companions would be painfully short.

His time with Taako would be far too short.

It’s not that he had ever counted on being an old man since the revolution in Raven’s Roost. It was very likely that he would be injured or killed trying to free the people of his homeland. It was those brief few months of peace after the fighting where he dared to imagine a future where he and Julia were old and weathered together, the Hammer and Tongs inherited in their name when Steven retired, the two of them sitting in some of Magnus’ rockers on the porch, maybe a grandchild or two playing with the dog just beyond the shade of the shop…

That was just a moment where he could taste the future on the wind, though.

Once that was gone, all that was left was…

Something, Magnus was sure.

He couldn’t remember what it was anymore.

He had sacrificed that memory.

Something bad had happened, and Julia and everyone else had been killed or fled, and Magnus wanted to --

Gone.

Every last inkling of what had happened, why there had been a fire in his belly for years after was gone, sacrificed to those fucking liches.

Dip.

 

Regardless, the thought of a future had died with her. Nothing mattered but protecting the weak and… That thing that he had lost.

Living to be old?

That one wasn’t on his to-do list.

Now, as he sat in their shared living space in the Bureau, he dared to ponder it for just a moment.

What to do after the last relic was recovered?

He had no idea what the Director planned to do after all seven were destroyed. Maybe that was all that was left. If that were the case, well…

 

Magnus’ eye wandered over the coffee table. There was an empty mug sat there, forgotten. It was smoothed with glaze but had clearly been thrown on a potting wheel. Clinging to the lip of it, where someone had sipped away at the contents, was a gelatinous, soft green goo.

Key lime go-gurt.

_ If that were the case, well… _

Shit.

 

Magnus stood, suddenly feeling very antsy. He strode quickly to his private room. Where the hell was his pocket workshop? He stooped to look through his bag, giving a friendly tap to Steven’s glass ball, rummaging through the equipment that he hadn’t yet put away from their last journey.

_ If that were the case… _

A door opened in the other room. Soft footfalls of stocking feet padded past Magnus’ door and into the kitchen. The stride was much too long to be Merle’s.

He slowed his rummaging, purposefully listening as a cabinet opened. Someone was cooking.

_ Well… _

He wasn’t looking anymore. He was staring blankly at nothing as his ears strained, trying to picture what was going on in the kitchen. Taako was chopping something slowly and without the flashy showmanship, not like he did when he made Candlenights macarons for their friends. It was deliberate and private.

The show was for Taako, not for prying eyes.

_ If that… _

Garlic was frying.

Oh, Taako, don’t do this to yourself, buddy.

_ Fuck me. _ Magnus really hadn’t touched base with the wizard or Merle after everything. He had wanted to be alone, and the other two had seemed to want the same.

He had seen the shawl thrown over the mirror in the bathroom not long after.

_ If that were the case… _

 

Between the three of them, no one was big on talking about feelings. Merle would probably straight up lie about his kids if he felt it wasn’t the time to discuss it. Magnus preferred not to bring up painful memories. Taako, however, had his baggage broadcasted to the entire world.

Someone probably had fantasy TiVo’ed what had happened in Glamorsprings, and while the wizard was certainly not an honest man, he couldn’t lie about the catastrophe. Magnus had had to hear from Carey who had heard from Avi who had heard from Angus who had been very reluctant to say anything about Taako’s comment on cooking. It was actually NO-3113 who knew what the detective was referring to, and had explained the situation to Magnus after his prying during a training day.

_ Well… _

The scent of 30 garlic clove chicken was creeping through his cracked doorway.

 

Magnus couldn’t see him, but he could SEE him in his mind’s eye, head down, eyes on the pan, hip cocked but concentrating, focusing, living and breathing the thing he was doing RIGHT NOW which was cooking the dish that had ruined his life. The thing that he loved, that made that soft, cracking voice come out, that he swore he would never do for the people he cared about.

The thing he would never do for Magnus.

 

_ If… _

Magnus only had a few years left in this world, at best. He had learned to live like you were dying tomorrow, but now, frozen, crouched in his room, he was drowning in the desire to live as long as he could.

Taako would be around for much longer.

Even if Magnus made it to the age of fifty and beyond, the elf would still exist; gorgeous, eye-catching, Taako who couldn’t be a chef anymore, who covered the mirror in the bathroom, who covered up everything with a wink and a quip and a spell like he wasn’t hurting.

_ … That were the case… _

 

Please don’t.

Please don’t feel like that again. That feeling just ends with one of you shattering when time and death split the two of you apart sooner than you could have guessed.

A few years or much, much, shorter was too raw, too sharp.

If someone were to feel what he had felt when Julia --

_ … Well… _

 

Magnus’ fist clenched around the strap of the forgotten bag in his hands.

In this moment, this very dangerous moment, he had a very, very stupid thought.

What was the point of those last few, short, years if you couldn’t be with the people that mattered?

_ If that were the case, well… _

 

“Fuck it.”

 

Magnus stood.

He didn’t so much RUSH in as he hesitantly moved towards his door and towards the kitchen.

Despite his motion towards the elf in the kitchen, he kept thinking about Julia, Julia, Julia…

He had said in Wonderland that he had no interest in dating, and he didn’t.

Her face was still so clear to him. He still remembered what her hair felt like when he smoothed a palm over it, and the way she smelled after finishing the laundry. He could hear her laugh and remembered the creases at the corners of her eyes, and the way he had marvelled at a woman so small being so strong, being right at his side through the thick of the revolution, the flex of her arms as she helped her father unload deliveries to the shop.

He could almost hear her chiding him now.

He knew Julia would have wanted him to be happy. It was something they had told each other during the revolution, when the threat of death was very real and hung over their heads like a fog the sun wouldn't burn through.

Before it was shocking and stole the wind from Magnus’ lungs in an instant as he rode over the last hill to Raven’s Roost, seeing the --

Gone again.

Dip.

 

_ If that were the case, well… _

He wasn’t READY.

Rather than swearing no one would replace her, he couldn’t find anyone who COULD. Not that he wanted to or was looking to; that person didn’t exist.

Rather, when it came to Taako, he didn’t NEED to look.

_ Well… _

 

Magnus opened the door. The smell of garlic and chicken hung in the air, but the sound of frying had stopped. Taako had his back to him, and the sound of a plate being scraped into the trash could be heard.

“Whatcha doin’, Taako?”

The elf turned, long lashed batting at Magnus. Disguise Self was still cast, and the elf was as beautiful as he had been before their trip to Wonderland.

Magic or not.

“Oh, I was just, y’know, sizzlin’ it up.” He shrugged, setting the dirty plate in the sink.

Taako sucked at doing the dishes.

Magnus continued the uncomfortable trek into the kitchen. “Yeah? No good huh?” He motioned to the trash.

Taako sighed. “Yeah, just uh… Just an all-around bad dish, y’know? Waste of good garlic.”

The next words caught awkwardly in Magnus’ throat but rattled their way out in a clunky, yet decipherable fashion. “Ca-can you show me?”

Taako looked up, surprised.

“What, like right now?”

“Yeah, I mean, if you’re not busy.”

“No, I guess not.” There it was. “I mean, there’s not much on the ol’ Taako roster for today, so what the hay?” There was that awkward glance away from Magnus’ eyes. “Yeah, let’s crank one out.” The wizard scratched the back of his neck, probably trying to look casual but failing and looking as uncomfortable as he always did when FEELINGS were involved.

 

The elf ushered him into the kitchen and Magnus washed his hands while Taako got out another pan.

He hesitated.

“You okay?”

There was a beat where Taako wasn’t looking at anything in particular, thinking hard. “Yeah… I was just thinking we should make something else.”

Magnus feigned surprise. “Oh, really?”

“Sure, like…” He could see the elf flipping through his mental cookbook, the handle of the pan still clasped in his slender fingers.

And Magnus couldn’t. Stop. Staring. At those fingers.

“Just like ANYTHING else. Literally anything but 30 garlic clove chicken.”

“Macarons?”

A shrug. “Sure.”

 

He turned and opened the pantry, searching for almonds and sugar. Magnus’ stare was drawn to the way his loose top draped off of one shoulder, the stray hairs clinging to his neck instead of where he’d pulled his hair into a ponytail to cook, the fact that there was no muscle to be found on the body of someone who dealt primarily with magic.

Not like Julia.

This was a completely different feeling for someone so drastically different from her but it was just similar enough to drive the icy shards of fear into his heart that had kept him out of the kitchen originally.

_ If that were the case, well… _

If that WERE the case, if he were to somehow live a long and happy life, or even if he were to die within the time it took to make the macarons, well…

He wanted to spend it with Taako.

 

“Now the first thing you’re gonna wanna do is…” Taako spread a handful of almonds onto his cutting board with his usual flourish. “... Chop the almonds reeeeally finely. The texture is just as important as the taste for a macaron.”

“Can’t you just use magic to do it?” Magnus asked as he watched the elf pull a knife out of the drawer.

“Mmm… You could.” Another moment of eye contact averted as he started chopping the nuts. “But sometimes it’s better to do things the non-magic way. There’s no point in the flash if you can’t get it to bang, darling.” He scoots over and holds the knife handle out to Magnus. “Here. You try.”

“Heh… Bang.”

“Now listen, if anyone’s gonna be making a dick joke in this kitchen it’s gonna be me!”

Magnus laughed. “You’re right. I’m sorry chef.”

“Yeah, that’s what I fuckin’ thought. Chop these damn almonds already.”

The fighter took the knife and started chopping. Taako watched him for a moment before grabbing his wrist.

“Okay, you’re doing it all wrong. I know you’re a big strong woodsman but when I say CHOP something, I don’t mean strike it down like a fucking gerblin in the woods.”

The elf moved behind him, slender arms looping around his middle, taking each wrist in a long-fingered hand.

Those fucking hands...

“The tip of the blade stays on the board, and then you rock…” Taako moved Magnus’ hands slowly, demonstrating the smooth motion of the knife. “Good. Keep doing that.”

His voice was that same cracking softness. The movement of his hands was practiced and flowed with the grace that seemed to dictate Taako’s every motion. Magnus was stiff at first, but started to relax into the rhythm of the knife. The wizard gently let go, letting the fighter move the knife on his own. His hands hovered over Magnus’ rough ones for a moment, seeing if he’d keep it up.

“Good.” He muttered in approval.

The hands moved away, brushing against forearms as they went. He wasn’t sure if it was on purpose or not until a small torso pressed into his back.

The knife stopped.

“Taako?”

“Mmm?”

“What are you doing?”

The torso pulled away. “What? I’m just showing you how to fix your knife work, bubbale.” The same joking tone of voice broke in letting Magnus know that he was trying to break the tension. “Why, with cuts like that it’s no wonder you swing an axe for a living! You should be a butcher instead of a baker.”

“Or a candlestick maker!” Came Merle’s shouted response from the other room.

They both jumped and looked towards the voice.

No response.

Leave it to Merle to completely ignore them all day until he had a shitty joke.

 

Magnus scratched the back of his head, not looking at Taako.

“A-anyway. What next?”

“Oh, well next we beat the egg whites.” The elf moved to get the eggs as he continued explaining. “It’s pretty hard to fuck up beating eggs but there’s a technique to it if you want them light and fluffy.” He handed Magnus a whisk, hesitated, then said. “Hang on, let’s do this again.”

The torso presses back against him and it’s all the fighter can do not to melt.

How long has it been since he’s had a gentle touch?

When was the last time someone held him?

Magnus crushes the first egg he tries to crack.

“Oh! Whoopsy-doopsy there Mags, scale it back a bit.”

“I wanna crack it in one hand.”

“Yeah you wanna crack it, not smash it all over my countertop. The one-handed thing takes a lot of practice my dude, not just beating it like it insulted your mother.”

“But it looks so cool!”

“Yeah, but it also looks cool when the eggshells don’t go everywhere!”

Taako took his hand again, gently tapping the egg against the bowl until it was sufficiently cracked. It was nowhere near as cool as the one-handed thing, but it definitely worked.

 

Taako’s hand guided his whisk, the elf’s shoulders bumping against Magnus’ back with the brisk motion.

“Okay, I think I got it.”

Taako seemed to stop himself from protesting. “Yeah, sure. Go for it.” He withdrew his arms and pulled back.

Magnus silently continued whisking the eggs for a moment before opening his mouth.

“Hey, can I ask you something?”

“Shoot.”

“Is this a way for you to cook for someone… Without actually cooking for someone?”

There was an uncomfortably long pause. The eggs don’t need to keep being whisked, but the silence would be unbearable.

“... What do you mean?”

“I mean like, I do the steps, but it’s you making me do the steps, so it seems like it’s really just you doi-- “

“I TOLD you it’s not like that Sazed!”

The whisking stopped.

“I-I mean Magnus. Practically the same name. Saaaagnusssed. See?”

“Taako -- “

“Nope.” The wizard turned away. “Not doing this.”

“Doing what?”

“THIS.” He crossed his arms. “We’re not talking about this. Do you wanna make macarons or not?”

“... I do, it just seems like - “

“I don’t fucking CARE what it seems like. I don’t wanna hear it.”

“Taako -- “

“NOPE.”

“Taa- “

“NUH-UH.”

Magnus pulled the elf into his chest. Taako stiffened at the sudden embrace. There was a long pause as they stood there, Magnus holding him.

Finally, a familiar hand touched his forearm.

“... So when you’re done with the eggs you wanna -- ”

“ _ Taako. _ ”

“... Yeah, I’m not having this talk with you, dude.” It wasn’t the same dismissive voice but rather the same softness when he talked about chopping almonds or beating eggs.

This was the real Taako once you stripped the performance away.

“I’m not having it, alright?”

“But why can’t you?”

“Because I can’t keep doing this with guys who are a bad match.”

That’s a punch to the gut for him. He lets go and the wizard pulls away, arms wrapped around himself rather than the fighter.

“Wh… What do you mean?”

“I mean I have fucked up taste, alright? The first guy I ever got with put me on a pedestal and I took advantage of that, and next thing you know… Poisoned chicken. Then I go out with a literal DEAD GUY -- “

“You WHAT?”

“Oh, yeah. I went on a date with Kravitz.”

“Wait, like the Kravitz who wanted to KILL us?”

“Yeah but that’s just water under the bridge my man. It was mostly to clear up the death toll in Refuge. We went to the Chug ‘n Squeeze. But, y’know… Even for a business date, the dude cleans up nice - “

“But he TRIED to KILL us!”

“Yeah, and he was just doing his job! And it’s fine now, anyway! Cool your jets!”

Magnus leaned back against the counter for a moment, his hand bumping against the discarded whisk.

“... What about me?”

“What ABOUT you?”

“What… Why am I grouped in with them? D-did I do something wrong?”

“Well, yeah. Kind of all the time.” Taako deflated a bit as he pantomimed a flex. “Magnus RUSHES IN is great and all, but every time you do that you get hurt -- “

“YOU get hurt too -- “

“Let me finish.”

“... Sorry.”

“I meant like… Do you care if you die?”

The silence felt like an eternity.

“... No.”

“See, that’s what I meant! You may sure as hell not care, but I fucking DO! And Merle does, and all your bureau buddies would have to deal with that. YOU may not care that you lost ten years, but that’s ten less years to be with US!”

Magnus rushes in, intending to kiss him, but Taako flinched, arms drawing up to stop him, and he stops, anchoring himself on one of those hands.

 

“... Don’t.”

 

“I’m sorry.” Magnus isn’t used to hearing his voice come out so softly. “I should’ve asked first.”

“Yeah, you should’ve, but I just don’t want you to kiss me for the first time to settle an argument.”

He’s dumbstruck by that completely logically point that never occurred to him. Another downside of acting and not thinking.

Dip.

 

“... I’m sorry.” He said again.

“It’s fine. Just… Not now.” Taako’s hands gently pushed at his chest, giving himself space.

He holds onto that hand but obliges. The elf doesn’t move to release himself but stares at the floor.

Magnus takes the pause to speak; “... Do you know why I started taking rogue lessons from Carey?”

“No.”

“So I could fight smarter.”

Taako looked up at him.

“I… I realized that if I did something stupid and fell in battle, that could mess things up for you and Merle, and I don’t want either of you to get hurt.”

“... That’s both very flattering and very stupid.” Taako sighed, squeezing the hand. “Tell you what. Worry about THIS gorgeous hunk of meat…” He tapped Magnus over his heart with his free hand. “... And THEN you can worry about this one.” He pressed Magnus’ hand over his own.

“... Holy shit, can I kiss you now?”

“Hell yeah.”

He scooped the elf up in his arms as Taako looped his own around the fighter’s neck. Appropriately, he was popping a foot.

Magnus shouldn’t have expected anything less.

 

The kiss shot way past tender and fishtailed into passionate territory, Magnus’ hands carding through Taako’s golden curls, pulling the ponytail free. God, he’d been wanting to do that for MONTHS. The elf’s hair was soft and smelled of some kind of flower Magnus couldn’t place as he tangled his fingers in it, his fingers feeling big and stupid and far too rough on Taako’s body where everything seemed to be soft and light. He cups the slender chin, and the elf is pressing tight against him as calloused digits traced a beautiful face.

_ Too rough. _ Magnus thinks, suddenly very aware of what carpentry and craftsmanship and fighting will do to your hands.

It felt wrong to touch him with something so damaged and rough, but he couldn’t bear to pull away just yet.

Taako’s hands moved to the back of his shirt, clinging for dear life before the two broke for breath.

“Whoo, boy howdy, you sure know what you’re doing.” The wizard gasped, seeming fairly flustered.

Magnus grins. “Yeah, I have macking proficiency - “

“Oh my God, shut up.” Taako kissed him again, pulling at his lapels.

The fighter was completely fine with staying here forever in the kitchen, continuing to kiss the elf until the universe stopped them.

Or, in this case, a gruff voice calling: “You guys making cookies?”

The two of them jumped, blinking at Merle who was now sat with a shit-eating grin at the counter.

“Oh, I’m sorry. Did I interrupt your cooking lesson?” He asked innocently.

“What do you THINK, dipshit? Get out!” Taako huffed.

“Pleeeease, can I lick the spoon?” Whined the dwarf.

“To be fair, we WERE making out in the kitchen.” Magnus offered, elbowing his partner. “If we wanted privacy, we would need to go somewhere else… Like my room.”

“OH. Okay. Heh… Easy there big fella. One thing at a time.” Taako patted his bicep, cheeks coloring. “You sure know how to woo a guy though, I will say that. Nice one.”

“Thank you. I practice in the mirror.”

“Is THAT what you’re doing in the bathroom in the mornings?”

“No, I’m mastrubating.”

Merle howled with laughter.

“What did I tell you about dick jokes in my kitchen?” Taako scoffed, rolling up his sleeves. “Alright, enough feelings, and enough -- “

“FEELINGS?” Merle sneered, wiggling his fingers suggestively.

“YEAH. THAT. Back to the problem at hand.”

Magnus barely caught the whisk that was shoved into his grasp.

“We’ve got macarons to make.”


End file.
